David Lee Roth addresses speculation about a Van Halen halftime performance at the next Super Bowl.(Getty Images)
It’s been eight years since Janet Jackson’s ill-fated wardrobe malfunction. Consequently, in the Super Bowl halftime shows since, the NFL has taken a much more conservative approach to musical acts, at least when it comes to accidentally intentional nakedness. We’ve seen the likes of Paul McCartney, The Rolling Stones, Prince, Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers, Bruce Springsteen, The Who, The Black Eyed Peas and Madonna. And now, if David Lee Roth has his way, Van Halen will be the feature act in New Orleans next February for Super Bowl XLVII. “I’m compelled to address the now-rampant rumors that Van Halen is playing the Superbowl [sic],” Roth said in a statement via the Van Halen News Desk (yes, we were as shocked as you that Van Halen has a news desk). “First of all let me say this — be still my pigskin heart. That honor has not been bestowed upon us at this time though it is one we would accept in a NY minute.” If this were an infomercial, this would be the part where Roth tells you why the band deserves the gig. “Van Halen’s collective memories are … teeming with been-theres and done-that’s, but none include playing at the Superbowl,” he said, presumably channeling Billy Mays. “Playing at the Superbowl is a veritable holy grail of musical recognition, a highly prized rite of passage for (game-changing) artists. Not a spiritual rite with snake pits or Hebrew school or anything, but it’s up there.” Um, sure. The frontman concedes that “We are not on Commissioner Goodell’s dance card at this time, but we would be most honored to dance the halftime away in New Orleans.”Finally, Roth, who signed the open letter “D-Ro,” added: “It’s an honor to be considered and for that we would like to thank the rumormongers all over the World Wide Web.” For more NFL news, rumors and analysis, follow @EyeOnNFL on Twitter, like us on Facebook, and subscribe to our Pick-6 Podcast and NFL newsletter. You can follow Ryan Wilson on Twitter here: @ryanwilson_07.